I would like to share three core principles which summarises what I call the coaching approach – a way of communicating that empowers someone else to make choices that are authentic for them: Advice Oscar Wilde said, “The best thing to do with good advice is to pass it ...
NLP and NLP Coaching started by noticing the questions of famous therapists and putting them into different groupings, which became known as the Meta Model. The model was influenced by the famous linguist Noam Chomsky and his principle of surface structure and deep structure. Simply put, in NLP, surface ...
Whether you are a newly qualified coach starting to build your confidence and experience, or have many coaching years under your belt, supervision is an invaluable resource. It offers an opportunity to meet with an individual or group who absolutely gets what you do for a living. It’s where ...
Working with beliefs in coaching is a fundamental part of helping clients achieve positive change. The Meta Model was the first model of NLP and was designed to help identify and categorise limiting beliefs into three groups: distortions, generalizations, and deletions. This post will give a summary of how ...
Why do so many of us feel we need to be perfect? Psychologist Carl Rogers emphasized the importance of self-acceptance and being enough rather than striving for an unachievable perfection. He also highlighted the significance of unconditional positive regard, both for ourselves and for others. Perceiving ourselves as good ...
Is loyalty to the first change system you learnt a hindrance? I have always been a sceptical person and that included during my original training in NLP over 20 years ago. I found that some in the NLP field seemed to be convinced that it was the ‘only way’ ...
An NLP concept I use a lot is that of Perceptual Positions – also known as ‘Different Perspectives’. The three most commonly used are: First Perceptual Position is the one we habitually use, seeing things from our own perspective. Second Perceptual Position is when we take another persons’ perspective. ...
NLP started out back in the 1970s with a technological approach to therapy (analysing the linguistic structure of unhelpful beliefs). I like to think it has retained some of that early rigour and clarity, but in other ways it has softened and become more humanistic. One of the key ...
The pandemic is putting a strain on many people, personally and in their close relationships. Between the unprecedented period of proximity for many families, and the underlying atmosphere of stress, uncertainty and fear on the global stage, this is understandable. I believe that good communication, as always, is the ...
Happiness has been a topic of discussion since the early philosophers. As a practice and a state, it is just as relevant in the present day. As the COVID-19 lockdown begins to affect people’s mood, many are starting to search for new ways of coping with uncertainty, bringing balance to ...
There is a saying: ‘charity begins at home’. Perhaps during these challenging times, we can change this to: ‘leadership begins at home’. In this blog I want to offer some ideas of how a leadership model can provide comfort and clarity in times of profound uncertainty and change. The ...
Juggling education and employment can be really difficult. Let alone someone else’s education, and your own employment. In the past few weeks, many parents have found themselves having to teach their children from home. All while holding down a full-time job remotely. So for those of you who are ...
In times of crisis, it is difficult to hold on to empathy. When faced with death, fear or scarcity, most of us retreat inwards. We put on our own masks first, before helping others. This is true of every situation which threatens to destabilise the normal order of things. And ...
Human beings are naturally drawn to binary thinking. It helps us make sense of the world, which is large, confusing, and ultimately unknowable. Instead, we prefer to believe that, in any given situation, something is either X or Y, with nothing in-between. Never X and Y. This is because the human ...
Welcome to 2020! A number for perfect vision and new beginnings. Each year, we resolve to become a little better, and take one step closer to our ideal versions of ourselves. But in our quest for perfection, the New Year can start to feel like a test. One that ...
Change for a New Era As I begin preparation for our course with Ed Hines, one of the key themes we will be covering is: how do you provide new coaching tools to deal with some the problems that we all face today? There is concern about major issues ...
During some recent coaching sessions, I was surprised to hear a number of people in senior roles saying they had ‘Imposter Syndrome’. What is Imposter Syndrome? Imposter Syndrome a phenomenon where individuals doubt their accomplishments and progress. Instead, they feel like they are on the brink of being exposed ...
NLP can be used everyday in practical situations – at work creating rapport with clients, in personal development by creating healthy relationships, in sales by getting a better understanding of customers issues and showing confidence. There are so many areas of life that can benefit with NLP, So I ...
Philosophy has for thousands of years, asked questions. Who are we? What makes us ‘tick’? What, if anything, can be done about the more painful aspects of human nature, and what is our purpose? So this week I wanted to blog this week on the often-confusing divide between coaching, ...
Last week I talked about four areas of ability, or ‘capability sets’, needed for successful leadership. These were: Operations (getting things done) Sales (dealing with people) Finance (dealing with money) ‘Pure’ leadership skills such as vision, optimism, decision-making and setting a personal example. Leadership: becoming a master In a ...
Transactional Analysis drivers One useful aspect of this material is the Transactional Analysis concept of ‘drivers’. These are very powerful, deeply ingrained subconscious motivations that are picked up in early childhood. TA theorists believe there are five of these: ‘Hurry Up’ ‘Please People’ ‘Be Strong’ ‘Be Different’ ‘Be Perfect’ ...
Confidence is a strange, ephemeral concept. We all want more of it or worry about not having enough of it – but what is it, exactly? NLP has a range of techniques to help us find out, and to boost what we find. How to regain self confidence The ...
NLP is full of techniques to use in the workplace, especially if one has managerial responsibility or is working as a consultant or HR professional. Modern management is largely about winning people round to your point of view. The old ‘command and control’ model taught on managers training courses ...
There seems to be a lot of anxiety around. The fashionable remedy for it is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), which has become ‘official’ – you can get it on the NHS. CBT has been proven to deliver results, but I believe NLP offers both a tool that is just ...
An NLP qualification looks good on a CV. No, it’s not an MBA from Harvard Business School, but it’s all part of showing yourself off to your best. To start with, it makes a clear statement that you take the business of developing yourself seriously. It sends out the ...
The one-word answer to this question is ‘yes’. I’ve helped a number of clients to do this, some of whom have been heavy smokers. Using Robert Dilts’ model of the Logical Levels, we can look at smoking and the various ways it exerts a hold on the psyche. The ...
Golf is a notoriously psychological sport. Fitness plays a part, of course, as do talent and plenty of practice, but in the end the business of knocking a little white ball into an only slightly larger hole in the ground up to 450 yards away is about mental attitude. ...
